Yeah, it's nothing juicy so get your mind out of the gutter.
No the tue confession today is about how much I love being in school and how much more settled i feel with more on my plate than I did when I was strictly a stay at home mom. Now part of that is just the nature of being a SAHM when the kids are babies. Somedays it is good some days it is really really hard, especially when you are doing the toddler years for several years on end as several kids move through that phase. I know that staying home was the right thing to do. I have no doubt about that. In fact it wasn't even a struggle to decide to do so. I hardly had an exciting career I was leaving behind! (I worked for a hospital system in PR writing articles for internal publication with a whopping salary of $16,000/ year.) And honestly, I have not had a lot of sympathy for women who say that they "just couldn't stay home, they'd go crazy!" or "I'm a better mom when I'm working." It was really hard for me to understand that on any level. I'd read studies that say that moms who are working feel less stress than moms who stay at home and pretty much blew them off. But let me tell you, the last 10 weeks or so have been so GREAT! I'm doing really well in school so that definitely helps the stress levels. But more than that, I've lost weight, I'm very content and settled feeling, despite the increased activity, and I can't tell you the number of people who have stopped me at church and said things like, "You look wonderful!" or even "Whatever you are doing, keep doing it, I've never seen you look better." And that's LOTS of people, ranging from thsoe who know about nursing school to those that don't.
I've invested so much into my kids over the last 11 years that it makes me feel a little guilty that I like this so much. Shouldn't I be miserable being away from them? Shouldn't I be totally stressed out and sleep deprived? Do my feelings of contentedness now mean that i would have been a better mom if I'd done this long ago? I hope not. I hope that as hard as staying home with little ones was in retrospect that it was worth it. And I hope that as much as I like this now I am not missing the signs that this is negatively affecting my kids. They seem pretty good too. They talk about wishing that i didn't have to go to nursing school oin this day or that day but the fact is that they have to go to school too!
Anyway, that's what I've been pondering lately.
Stream of Consciousness at the Las Vegas Airport
8 years ago
2 comments:
I am a true believer that there is a 'season' for your life; you have just finished one season of your life; when your kids needed you 24/7. They don't need you quite as much as before and maybe you are feeling a little of the need to grow too, and there is nothing wrong with that. A healthy family life allows members to have their own interests and pursuits. This is making you a better wife and mother, just listen to those people talking to you. I think God speaks to us through people and I think he is very pleased that you are doing something constructive for yourself, your family and those around you. I think you've broadened your scope as a mother; now you are in nursing, it kind of correlates - taking care of others. It's what we chicks do well, if we aren't afraid to admit it.
I did leave an exciting career behind to stay home and raise my kids. I've always worked part time from home, but I've given up the trips, the accolades, the perks of being a professional. I absolutely think it is worth it. I'm sure my 'season' will come, again, too, just like you.
You should feel very proud of yourself that you have been able to balance your life so wonderfully and realized when it has been appropriate and necessary to make the choices you have. You are an inspiration to all of us moms!
What Karen said---
Just lookin' forward to the day I get to see you in person too and tell you how great you look!!!
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